Servants Give (Mark 10:35-45

Here’s Sunday’s message, our fourth in our “Identities and Rhythms” series. You can listen here.

We’re taking a short break from our series in Matthew. We’ll jump back there soon. But right now, we’re spending time revisiting our Karis vision. We’re walking through six identities that we have as the people of God. And also six rhythms that flow out of those identities.

Last week, we talked about our identity of family. Now imagine a family that looked like this. Dad is in the kitchen, preparing dinner, running around stressed. While the soup is simmering and the bread is baking, he’s running the vacuum. He’s taking out the trash. Meanwhile, everyone else is chilling on the couch, gazing at their phones, and not raising a finger to help.

Or a picture a housing situation like this. Four roommates sharing a home. One woman does all the shopping, handles all the cooking, and keeps up with the cleaning. She takes care of all the bills - meaning she not only makes sure they’re paid, but they also all come out of her account. All the while, the other three ladies go about their lives and never lend a hand.

Now is either a good picture of the way things should be? Well, of course not. If we’re family, a household, we should act like it. Right? And that’s what we’ll consider in our time today. How should we see ourselves? How should we live together - if we see ourselves a living in gospel community?

Who God Is

If you were with us last week, we talked about how God Himself lives in community. Father, Son, and Spirit. One God. Three persons. Each equally God. In perfect unity and love. Forever and ever. That’s how they relate. But have you thought about how those three persons work together?

God the Father sends His Son to earth. He willingly goes - and gives. Both the Father and the Son send the Spirit to us. He submits and goes. And willingly shines the spotlight on Jesus. One day the Son will give the kingdom back to His Father. There is selfless giving. There is sacrificial love. And this is within God Himself.

Now that has implications for how we all live together. We get the opportunity to image that to our world. But I’m getting ahead of myself. Let’s first jump back into our passage for today.

Jesus and the Sons of Zebedee

Mark 10 again. First, catch the disciples’ request. Christ and his guys are on the road, heading up to Jerusalem, and Jesus tells them something for the third time. That He is going to die. And James and John follow that up with this ask.

Now we’ve all seen big news followed by bizarre, inappropriate questions. You hear a family member has stage three inoperable cancer, and you follow it up with, “Hey, are there any vending machines around here?”

This goes way beyond that. A crazy question. But a bold demand. Did you hear verse 35? “Teacher, we want you to do for us whatever we ask of you.” Imagine saying that to Jesus! These guys that, elsewhere, want to call down fire from heaven on people. Here, they completely ignore the Lord’s teaching, and they follow it up with a selfish, offensive demand. But Jesus doesn’t hurl flames at them. He kindly throws them a bone. He says, “What do you want me to do for you?”

And then they demand, in verse 37: “Grant us to sit, one at your right hand and one at your left, in your glory.” So this isn’t, “So, you’re gonna die. Can I have your Blackhawks jersey?” This is, “You’re gonna rule the world. Can we be your V.I.P.s?” Jesus is on a road, leading to suffering, and ultimately His death. They’re thinking about living their best life into the future, about fortune and glory.   

Maybe you’ve heard about the new ride at Six Flags - the Catwoman Whip. Everyone walks up, eager to jump on. But you should see people as they’re staggering off. Now I don’t get motion sickness. And I don’t tend to get scared. But I’ve seen nothing like that. A massive pendulum that rotates, and extremely fast - sixteen stories in the air. And the seats you’re strapped into are rotating, as well. I’ve never felt so disoriented and out of control on a ride. I wanted to tell the people who were jumping into line, “You ready for some fun? You have no idea what you’re getting into!”

That’s basically what Jesus says here, in verse 38. “You do not know what you’re asking.” You think this is gonna be awesome. It may be. But it won’t be easy. Now, in the disciples’ defense, their request really wasn’t that dumb. They’re expecting a Messiah who’ll defeat the Romans and restore a Jewish state. They’re in Jesus’s inner circle. They’re probably just asking, “We’re rolling with you now. Can we still hang with you then?” We could even put a positive spin on it. They have faith. That He’ll win. But they’re still being selfish.

Don’t we, also, act the same way? Where we think of Jesus as a way toward our “best life now?” Or as a means of getting us power in our country? More on that in a bit. But we shouldn’t look down on James and John any more than the others.

Second, then, see Christ’s challenge. In verse 38, we’ve already seen part of His response. “Oh, brother. You guys don’t get it, do you?” But then He goes on, explaining what the ride will actually be like. He responds, “Are you able to drink the cup that I drink, or to be baptized with the baptism with which I am baptized?”

Now James and John respond, “We are able.” But clearly, they still have no idea what’s going on. They could be saying, on one hand, that they know there’ll be a battle - before He sits on that throne. And that they’re there. And they’ll fight. And again, there’s some nobility in that. But Jesus is getting at something far more difficult.

On the other hand, sometimes the “cup” meant celebration. And “baptism” was often associated with renewal. And sure, those boys, are willing to volunteer for that. But Jesus is talking about His suffering. And ultimately His death. And that’s what the disciples are really signing up for.

The “cup” in the Old Testament often refers to God’s wrath. When Jesus pleads, later in the garden, “Remove this cup from me,” He’s talking about that cup. He’s asking if He really has to drink it - if there might be some other way. And when the Bible talks about going under water - about “baptism” - in the Old Testament books, it’s often talking about pain - about judgment, also. My mind goes to Psalm 42:7, where the Psalmist cries out: “Deep calls to deep at the roar of your waterfalls; all your breakers and your waves have gone over me.”

This is what Jesus says getting to glory requires. It’s suffering. And Jesus tells them, “You really aren’t able. But you’re going to go through it anyway.” In verses 39 and 40, He essentially says, “You will drink that cup. You’ll be pulled under, for sure.” “But to sit at my right hand or at my left is not mine to grant, but is for those for whom it has been prepared.” There we see that loving, submissive relationship I mentioned at the start - inside our triune God. “That’s my Father’s decision.” That’s what Jesus says. And He’s good with that.

Well, verse 41 says, that this sets off the rest of the crew. They’re “indignant,” it says. But they’re no better than James and John. They likely just wanted to call shotgun themselves. And again, we’re no better than any of them, either. Because we want the crown without the cross just as much.

Jesus then talks and cuts through the tension on that road. And He gives us what are some of the most familiar and challenging words in all of Scripture. In verses 42 through 45, He says this again:

Mark 10:42 And Jesus called them to him and said to them, “You know that those who are considered rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them.

Mark 10:43 But it shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant,

Mark 10:44 and whoever would be first among you must be slave of all.

Mark 10:45 For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

Jesus says, “You want to be great? Become a servant. Be small. You want to be first? Then be a slave. Go last. And here gives us an identity that should define us as His people.

Our Identity: Servants

Now our identity refers to how we see ourselves. Of our sense of who we are. And how do we generally come up with today? Now if you’re trying to get to know someone at a party, what's the first question you so often ask? “What do you do?” If someone asks you that, you might respond, “I’m a builder. I make houses for people.” And that’s a noble vocation, for sure.

But what happens if a truss falls and it crushes your limb? Or the market crashes and you lose your job? Who are you then? We need a sense of who we are that goes much deeper. Identities are received. They’re not built.

I’m a Larson, but more importantly a Christian. And out of that fundamental way I see myself, some other identities flow. And none are bigger than the one we see today, our third in this series. We are servants. Here’s how we put it in Karis:

We are servants of God and His gospel who serve others as a way of life.

Karis, this is who we are. We are servants together. If you read the New Testament, this becomes a title for both leaders in the church and members of the body. There are really two different words - one that was also used in that day for a household slave. And another that has at its root “waiting on tables.” Both communicate the same idea. We’re people who make ourselves low in order to lift others high. We orient our lives around others and not ourselves. Of course, we first see ourselves as servants of God. But from that, we also live as servants of others.

This starts in the heart with an attitude. That moves to the hands, and results in action. And in three realms. Our time. Our talent. Our treasure. Our time. How do we use it? Is it all used to seek out what I want? Our talent. Our gifts. Do we use them for the family? Our treasure. Our money. Is it for us - or for them? We have to think of ourselves as servants in all three areas. And it shows up in life. In our community, we serve one another.

And, as we do this, we follow the example of our King. That’s what stands out in this passage. Right? Jesus tells disciples - back then and now - to see ourselves in this way. And He explains that in the last sentence of this teaching.

In verse 45, He says, “For even the Son of Man came not to be served to to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many.” Who deserves to be served more than Him? But He came to earth with service in mind. And He even gave up His life. He paid the price. For our redemption.

Jesus is the one who came and washed feet. He is the one who went up on the cross. He’s not like the kings of this world. And He is our example.

Now our tendency is to want to be celebrities. We want the attention, to get the love - to have people serve us. Like these disciples - James and John - here. Maybe you heard about the mom frying pancakes for her boys. The two started arguing about who would eat first. And their mother saw that this was a teachable moment. And she said, “If Jesus were sitting here, He’d say, ‘Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait’ and go next. Billy turned to his younger brother and said, ‘Bobby, you be Jesus!’” We want to go first. We want to sit on the throne. But Jesus says, “No matter what you may feel, and no matter what they say, that’s the path away from greatness. It’s not the way of the King.” What’s our posture as we live with one another?

And what’s the impression that we give to the world? As a family, we can communicate that we want to be in power. A recent poll revealed that a disturbing number of Americans want our country declared a Christian nation. We look down on those around us. We don’t kneel to serve. We try to elevate ourselves, rather than lift others up. Like James and John and the boys, we try to use Jesus for what we want. And that does not fit with who we are.

Ray Ortlund says that there are two ways to enter a room. Either, we strut in and say, “Here I am.” Or we look around and say, “There you are.” It’s not too hard to see which one should characterize us as Christians.

Two Words for Leaders

Now James and John are being trained by Jesus. And they’ll become leaders in His church. This is at least in part a statement about those in authority. I know here today are many who do want to lead - in the church, and also out in the world. And here are two things that I want you to hear.

First, learn to serve if you really want to lead. We’re seeing today what happens to self-interested leaders. Jesus is looking for servant-leaders. For leaders like Him. So before you get to making big decisions - how about you start by stacking some chairs? As Jerome Gay puts it: “If service is beneath you, leadership is beyond you.”

Second, seek to be led if you really want to serve. If you want to serve as a leader, first learn how to submit to authority. Learn what it means to follow before you try to be first. Serve those around you. And even those above you. And then you’ll be in a far better place to lead well. Because it’ll be less about you and more about others.

D. L. Moody once hosted a conference for a group of pastors from Europe.  And their custom there was that you’d leave your shoes overnight by the door. Servant boys would come and give them a clean and a shine. That’s what these pastors did. But that wasn’t the custom in America. And no servants would come and grab the shoes in front of that dorm. So Moody took them to his room, and he did it himself. He said nothing, but one pastor witnessed it, and spread it around. And they then took turns spiffing up each others’ shoes for the rest of the conference.

Servanthood can be contagious. And it should be part of our culture. It’s who we are. And it starts with leaders. Let me say, over the past several difficult years, I’ve seen our elders here wash feet and give up their lives - for you and for me. And I’m so grateful for them. But that is the way of the King, is it not? If you think you want to lead, you better get ready to suffer. You may be like James and John - and have no clue what you’re asking.

Now we’re familiar with the cross - with that symbol - the main one of our faith. But we struggle with where the cross leads. Paul Miller has written this book called the J-Curve. He says the J gives a picture of where the way of Christ takes us. We go down. We go low. We drink the cup. We’re baptized into His death. And then, in the proper time, we’re raised up. We experience His resurrection. We, too, go through suffering. But then glory is down the road. We humble ourselves. And that is the way to true greatness. We aren’t just people who serve. We’re servants.

Our Rhythm: Giving

I want to turn now to our rhythm. If you’re a builder, you look over blueprints, you hammer in nails, you spend time at Lowe’s. If you’re a Christian, if you’re a servant - if that’s who you are, it leads to a rhythm. You give. It’s what you do. Here’s how we express this in Karis:

We consistently give to one another in love, using our gifts for the good of the community.

What do servants do? What is the rhythm of their lives? They give. Yes, of their time, their talent, their treasure. But how? Here, we use four adverbs that describe how we want to give. Sacrificially. We give until it hurts - until it actually affects our lifestyle. We don’t just skim off the top. Systematically. Sure, giving spontaneously is good. But it’s far better to help leaders budget. To get on a schedule. Primarily. We make ourselves first part of a family. And don’t neglect needs that are close to home. Cheerfully. Although giving with a smile and with a heart of joy isn’t always where we’re at, we long for that. We pray for that. That we would give, and do it out of love.

How about when? Sure in more formal and scheduled ways. We need help on Sundays. In many ways. With kids probably the most. And most of you are in a Missional Community, where you can meet needs around you there. But we’re also ready to serve when any needs arise. And I think we’re really good at this. A bunch of people pitched in - and sent Tooley off to North Carolina with a new guitar. The Swansons’ floor needed replaced and several jumped in and helped. Opportunities arise, and we’re ready to rock.

What about the where? Galatians 6:10 puts it this way: “So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith.” Yes it starts here. If we’re family, we serve on another. I see your problems as mine. My needs become yours. And we do whatever we can, whenever we can, to take care of one another. But we also seek to serve out in our city. You coach that team over in Douglass Park. You run that PTA meeting in that school across town. The where is everywhere. It starts here and spreads out into the world.

Now, as we do this, we walk in the way of the kingdom. Look at what Jesus says in verses 42 and 43 again. Back in the time we were living in Kentucky, my wife took care of a patient who happened to be a high-ranking leader in the Roman Catholic Church. He looked at Amy, and said, “Do you know who I am?” She, of course, thought, first, I’m a Protestant. And second, I’m going to treat you just like everyone else. Jesus says, you know what the Gentiles - the non-believers do. They throw their weight around. They make sure all know who’s in charge. Of who you are. That’s not the way of the Kingdom. He says, “But it shall not be so among you.” No. Act like Christians. Not Gentiles. And give. Resist glory. Don’t lean into it. Empty your lives. Don’t fill up with it. That’s what you’re to do.

But our tendency is to take, right? To be consumers. To use others to get. Like James and John. Use Jesus. And Jesus’s people. Not contributors. But consumers. And this is sad. Sure, we all long for power. But we also want comfort. To not be inconvenienced. To not be challenged. We long for purpose but we want comfort too much.

I like the way Michael Horton puts it: “Everyone wants to save the world, but no one wants to do the dishes.” Maybe it’s in doing the little things - and in making ourselves little - that we’d end up finding our purposes and become a part of changing the world.

America is a consumeristic place, right? And we want other people to do stuff for us. It think it’s why we’ve all freaked out when we can’t get our cheap plastic crap fast in the mail. Or when we’ve found ourselves trapped in a drive through for an hour. We’re Americans. It’s what we deserve. But here’s what’d hard to say.  Something happening across America. We’re seeing this in the church - and more so after COVID. It’s pulling teeth to get people to serve. We can say we want to impact our city. But that means all of us have to sign up. Too much of the time, and especially now, the church is like a football game. You have 22 people on the field who are exhausted, giving it their all. And you have 80,000 people eating hot dogs and watching. This can’t be. We’re servants. We give.

Now I know it can be a drag to talk about topics like this. But here’s the irony. The more we give, we get. “It is more blessed to give than receive.” Not only do our hearts become full - but so do our hands. As we care for others, others care for us. God meets our needs. He blesses us. We have to trust Him, Karis.

Servants and Stewards

But here’s something else important I have to clarify. Where are we getting this stuff that we give? C. S. Lewis says it’s like a kid who asks his dad for money - so she can buy him a birthday present. It still gives him pleasure. But he’s the one that bought the gift.

And that’s an important thing we can’t forget as we think of ourselves as servants. As Paul put it, “What do you have that you did not receive?” (1 Cor. 4:7). Everything we have comes from Him, right? So we’ve not just servants. We’re stewards.

That means we’re managers. God has given us our days, our time. God’s given us gifts, material and spiritual. And we’re to act like stewards and use them well. And be faithful. And give.

A Challenge for Members

Earlier I gave a challenge for leaders. Here are two also for members. First, receive help yourself and don’t just be a person who gives. Pride goes both ways. You can be the person who feels this need to be served. And you can be the person who feeds this desire to be needed. You can prove yourself by how awesome you serve. And you can prove how awesome you are by not being served.

You have trouble asking for help? That’s not good. If you don’t want to be a charity case, then you’re not a good fit for Christianity. Because Jesus came and taught a message of grace. So humble yourself and not only serve, but be served yourself.

Give, second, even when you don’t feel like you will receive. Too much we let what we think is our calling get in the way of our actual serving. Yes, pursue how you think you’re gifted to serve. But also serve in ways that are needed. Maybe that’ll be a way God prepares you to serve. Maybe it’ll be the way He gets to your heart. Don’t just try to feel useful. Actually be useful.

Tim Keller talks about three ways to think about our calling. Affinity - what I like to do. Ability - what I truly can do. Opportunity - what needs to be done. Absolutely pursue A and B. But don’t miss out when people come asking for help. Seek to meet needs that you see all around. And don’t just try to meet a need inside you. When we serve in ways that don’t excite us or maybe stretch us, it gives us an opportunity to trust more in God’s grace.

I want to brag about a group in our church. That serves tirelessly our youth. We’ve never had a traditional youth pastor. And I don’t think I miss that model at all. We have a team that saw a need. And they sought to meet that need. And they love and serve our growing youth group. And I couldn’t be more grateful. That’s what it looks like when we see ourselves as servants and give. Where we pour out our lives, like Jesus. And love.

Questions for Application

Much like a couple of weeks back, I want to close with seven probing questions that may help you as you try to apply what I’ve said today.

First, in what ways are you avoiding this identity? Would those around you call you a servant?

Second, would you say your life is characterized by humility? Does it show up in the way you give? And allow others to give to you?

Third, as you think about your giving, where might you be holding back? What about time, talent, treasure? In what ways do you need to grow? Are you serving sacrificially, systematically, primarily, cheerfully?

Fourth, would you say that your gifts are used for others? Are you also serving in ways that are needed?

Fifth, do you bristle when the church talks about giving? Why could that be? What might it say about how you see God?

Sixth, in what ways do you resist being served by others? How do you try to prove yourself by your serving?

Seventh, how might you be attempting to build an identity apart from God? How do you need to better lean into your identity in Christ?

What God Has Done

The one thing I never got to is why we give. How do we get the kind of heart of love that gives with our hands? I talked at the beginning about how we see service, how we see giving, in God Himself. Right? So one motivation would be to image Him. To show His glory to the world. But another comes as we think about what God has done. We don’t want to give out of guilt. We also don’t want to give out of greed. We want to give out of grace.

Why do we end up not seeing ourselves as servants? And not living a lifestyle of giving? Gospel forgetfulness. Right? How much we have been loved. I think of 2 Corinthians 8:9, where Paul says, “For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though he was rich, yet for your sake he became poor, so that you by his poverty might become rich.” Remember from earlier - how one term for servant often referred to those who wait on tables?

Maybe you’ve heard of the way people tip in restaurants after church. Where folks give what servers deserve after hearing a message of grace. That just can’t be. But we can forget what God has done in the ten minutes it takes to drive to a restaurant!

What’s the way to get back following the example of the King and walking in the way of the Kingdom? Gospel wakefulness. Remembering what He’s done for us. And praising Him for it. That gives us the motivation for serving and giving.

Servants and Giving

My wife serves tirelessly, as many of you know. Even through her pain. But she’s been known to take things a bit too far. Now before she was a Christian, and part of a church, she used to move herself into apartments. I mean, she carried dressers and mattresses and televisions up stairs all by herself. Seriously. She didn’t sit on the side and watch her brother do all the work. But she also didn’t seek to lean on others and let them share her load.

A few years back, we were about to move into a home. And I broke my wrist and had surgery to repair it. And our church family came around us and served us so well. There was no Amy strapping couches to her back. But we were family. And people served.

Imagine if we all worked together. And carried each others’ burdens together. No one would break her back. Everyone could feel a part of the family. And we’d get more done. No one would look like a superhero and steal glory from Jesus. Everyone could serve our Lord and make Him look great. May that be us, Karis, as we seek to be servants. And give of our lives. Let’s pray.